THE GREAT DERBY
are just two days left before the county derby between
the football teams of 'Little Water' and 'Yellow Devils'.
The hosts, officials of the 'Small Water' team, given
their players five days of preparation at the Rogla
mountain resort, so they can prepare themselves in quarantine
and peace, because this derby is eternal. Their fans
didn't rest, especially since the local TV station announced
the broadcasting of the abbreviated recording of the
match. The fans' headquarters had a session at the coffeehouse
Have you prepared the slogans? - said ex player Ruzic,
coordinating the whole action.
'Sike' readily answered with a few new verses and exclamations
for chanting and scanning: 'Little Water, Little
Water, we will fuck the Devils'; 'Little Water beats
to quarters'; 'Little Water, no surrender', 'Little
Water till the day of slaughter', 'Near the Water pit,
played a yellow shit', 'Sime is a goal-getter, in-time
setter'. However, everyone agreed the last slogan
was not appropriate and rejected it.
OK. When's the torchlight parade? - formally asked Ruzic,
known amongst the fans as the 'Dread'.
In the 47th minute - answered Iron, also called Chile
Paprika, a renowned pyrotechnics expert. - We have a
new green smoke screen. Fresh stuff.
OK. Who will be sacrificed?
Little Jadranov, he's the one. He said, as far as he's
concerned - that he doesn't mind getting a sound thrashing.
It will be just before the end, if trouble occurs.
Fine - said Ruzic the 'Dread' and then he turned towards
the policeman Viseslav, whose fan name was Blockhead:
'Start beating him as soon as he jumps over the fence.
I will take care of instructing him how to 'pass out'...
an hour before the match, Sike came to Dread and said,
Fuck, what if Blockhead overdoes it with Little Jadro
as he did when he launched Grco Tulip into a coma?
We will collect money for the wheel chair. We desperately
need those 30 secs on TV, old chap - said the legendary
THE GREAT DERBY
meeting was opened by Purga, charged by direction to
talk with the ultra-right wing of the supporter's group
Before we start... - moved on Purga, but was immediately
interrupted by the fans' leader.
Pass on some beer, dammit, at least one container.
I would ask you, Dear Supporters, to...
You lying faggot, don't be a shiteater. The other day
you disowned us in the newspapers! - yelled Rambus from
behind the meeting hall.
... so, for a start, I would ask you to... - Purga tried
You can pray to Dear God that we don't fuck the whole
stadium up - someone hissed again.
... please, let us start...
Start, may a dog fuck your bones - a supporter's fan
yelled everyone else down.
... for a start, please do not throw the ash... - Purga
But what? Should we throw our dicks instead - snapped
... do not throw the ash into the Club's cups - Purga
went on, supplicating.
Look at this shithead, dammit! This is not your fucking
club, dickhead, I shit on that, these dickfull cups
are the club's, which means ours as well, fuck it.
Yeah, Joker's right, the cups belong to the Club, and
not to the Direction.
On the behalf of the Direction and players, I plead
for the agreement.... Purga tried again.
You can agree with your mother's cunt - supporter's
leader snapped out at him again - and we are going to
get ourselves a beer.
Please, we have a chance to win the Cup this Sunday...
- Purga tried again.
I'll impale your arse - Stampede's leader called out
and turned towards the fans.
hearing the shout 'Sta- sta- stampedeeeooouuu' everyone
started to overturn tables, flinging chairs at Purga
and grabbing the club's cups from the shelves. After
they ran out of the Direction's building with prey in
their hands, they filled the streets surrounding the
stadium with a song: The Cup is ours, the cup is
ours, the cup is ours....'